


Craft

by MilkyBoi



Category: Hell's Kitchen (US TV) RPF, Kitchen Nightmares RPF
Genre: Angst, Crack, F/M, Family, Kitchen Nightmares, Kraft Dinner, On Wattpad, Romance, Sorry Not Sorry, also on trebleotakustar, trust me - Freeform, u wont regret reading this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-16
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-02 09:46:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20273914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MilkyBoi/pseuds/MilkyBoi
Summary: On this episode of Kitchen Nightmares, Gordon Ramsey returns yet again to another failing restaurant, this time he's greeted by two former Hell's Kitchen contestant's and they have some surprises in store for him.





	Craft

Gordon had been having a very tough day. He had just wrapped up his follow up episode on Amy’s Baking Company and was ready to move on to his next kitchen nightmare. 

‘That Amy’s a fucking Donkey’ He sighs under his breath.   
“-Insert sassy comment here-” Jean Philippe  
“Well it can’t get much worse than that right?” 

But little did he know…..

***

Colleen and Trevor anxiously awaited Ramsey’s arrival. Colleen nervously began preparing food for tonight's service while Trevor got his kids to a safe place where he could keep a watchful eye on them. They had called chef Ramsey over a month ago about their failing restaurant. They had opened Craft in 2007, and business had been running well for the first few years. But lately it has been on a steady decline. 

“Oh Trev, what if this doesn't work out?” Colleen asked. 

Trevor pulled his wife into a tight embrace. “Chef Ramsey can fix anything my dear.”  
“We need to get things right for the kids.”   
“Just keep preparing the food as you always do.” Trevor gently place a cooking utensil in her hand. “You’ve never gotten a single complaint from our customers.”

And so she got back to work….

***

Gordon stepped out of his black truck and looked upon his latest endeavor. 

‘CRAFT’ The sign said in giant orange letters. He walked slowly towards the restaurant and reached his hand out towards the front door. Inside was the strangest decor he had ever seen.   
Orange everywhere. Just orange and blue. It was quite the eyesore. 

“Welcome to Craft.” A young waitress greeted. She took him and sat him down at a small table near the back. “My name is Michelle and I will be your server for tonight.” She hands him a menu and retreats back to the kitchen. 

Chef Ramsey perused the menu noticing some interesting items.   
“Pizza pie? Cheddar Explosion?” He muttered under his breath. ‘ Oh dear, oh dear.”

After ten minutes of waiting, the young waitress returned.   
“May I take your order?” Michelle asked.   
“Ah yes. What is this uh..Cheddar Explosion?” 

Michelle looked slightly frightened. She nervously shifted from side to side. “It’s uh...Mac and Cheese.”  
He looks at her slightly confused. “Mac and Cheese? Oh dear, oh dear. In a fine dining restaurant? I guess i’ll get something else then.” Michelle smiled nervously.   
“So what would you like?”

“I’ll have the Cesar Salad, the Burger, the Turkey, and lastly cake.”  
“Alright. I’ll take this to the chef.”  
“Thank you Darling.”

Now all he had to do was wait….

****

Michelle brought the order the order into the kitchen. Colleen was taken aback as she had been unaware of Chef Ramsay's arrival.  
“One order of Caesar Salad. The Burger, and The Turkey” Michelle read off “oh and Cake.”  
“Okay, right on it,” Colleen ordered her sous chef to begin the preparation on their star guests order. She wondered how Trevor was doing right now.

****  
“Chef Ramsay, welcome to my restaurant,” Trevor cheerfully greeted his guest, “I hope everything's up to your standards.”  
“So uh what’s with the decor?” Gordon asked  
“Oh uh well, we wanted to stick with the theme.”  
“Theme?”  
“The Craft Theme,” Trevor smiled knowingly.  
“Well it’s burning my eyes,” Ramsay complained.  
“Oh, I’m so sorry chef,” Trevor apologized, “but every restaurant must have a theme!”  
“Sounds like some kind of art project.”  
“TREVOR!” a scream is heard from the kitchens  
“Oh dear,” chef Ramsay places his head in his hand as Trevor runs to the kitchens.

****  
Trevor arrived in the kitchen to the sight of his wife in complete disarray. He looked around for any signs of danger but saw everything was running smoothly.  
“Trev, I don’t think he’ll understand my cooking,” she cried running into his arms.  
“You just need some fresh air,” he gently pulls his wife away and turns to the sous chef, “finish the Cesar salad while my wife takes a break.”  
The sous chef immediately returned to her duties, putting the secret sauce on the salad. She then calls for Michelle to take the order out to Gordon. Her and Michelle looked into eachothers eyes sharing a brief moment of regret, Michelle begins to sweat heavily as she takes the plate out into the dining room.

****  
“Well that didn't take very long,” Gordon compliments as he sees Michelle making her way towards him with an orange bowl. She sets the bowl down and looks to see Gordons reaction.  
“What the fuck is this,” Gordon stares as the mess in front of him. A seemingly normal cesar salad, with a strange orange topping, “what the fUCK is this?” he angrily points at the orange topping.  
Michelle avoids his gaze  
“... it’s the secret sauce..” she mumbled.  
“Looks like an orange just threw up on top of this salad!” Gordon and Michelle share a brief laugh, “well I guess I’ll dig in.”  
He sticks his fork into the salad, making sure to catch a little bit of the secret sauce on his lettuce.  
“So is all of this homemade?” he questions.  
“Uhh, well no,” she replies sadly.  
“Oh dear, oh dear,” he sighs, “I can’t eat this, send it back!”  
“Seriously?” she says.  
“Thank you dear,” he waves her off shaking his head.  
As Michelle retreats back to the kitchen, Ramsay turns toward the cameras.  
“A restaurant serving store bought food is a sure sign as to why it’s failing,” he says.

****  
Colleen returns to the kitchen with Trevor close behind. She immediately gets to work on the next dish. 

Michelle entered the kitchen holding the uneaten bowl of salad. Colleen turns to her. A horrified expression graces her face as she takes in what Michelle is holding.   
“What didn’t he like about it?” Colleen asked.   
“Store bought food.”  
“Well the salad was homemade. I can’t just make the secret sauce.”

Michelle rolls her eyes. “Well he refuses to eat store bought sauce.”   
Colleen feels a small tear rolling her cheek and into the turkey. “I see...Please take the burger to him.”   
“As you wish.” Michelle takes the dish and reluctantly leaves the kitchen. 

****

Ramsey waved Michelle over as she exited the kitchen.   
“Is this the burger, my darling?”

Michelle nods her head and places the burger down in front of him. He looks up at her, a questioning look in his eyes.   
“Your menu wasn’t very specific. “ He comments as he lifts the bun. “There is no meat in this bun. All I see is two pieces of bread and a pile of Mac and Cheese.”   
“That’s the burger sir.” She cringes. 

“I see,,,well for one thing it looks like shit.” He cuts into the soggy bun. “Is this also store bought.?”  
“Only the Mac and Cheese.”   
He stares her down. “So you’re saying. That these buns are homemade?”  
“Oh no...we got them at the bakery down the street.”  
Ramsey hits his fist against the table. “Send it back.” 

Michelle immediately reached for the plate and retreated towards the kitchen. 

Ramsey turns towards two customers who are enjoying a bowl of Mac and Cheese. “What is going on in this place?” He mumbled to himself. 

“Looks like the only hand made thing in this resturaunt is the strange decor.”

***  
Colleen stared down at the Turkey as the burger was thrown into the trash. She startles at the sound of the burger hitting the bottom of the trash can. She turns to her sous chef.  
“Oh I can’t do this. He isn’t eating anything.”

The sous chef stays quiet.   
“I really thought my Mac and Cheese burger was going to be a hit. Should I even bother sending out this turkey?”

Trevor takes the plate of turkey and gives his wife a kiss on the cheek. “He’ll eat the turkey hon. I’ll make sure of it.” He confidently leaves the kitchen strutting towards Ramsey’s table.

***

“Dear God. I pray I can eat this one.” Ramsey sighed as he saw Trevor exiting the kitchen. 

Trevor carefully places the plate in front of Ramsey and takes the seat in front of him. “ I really think you’re going to enjoy this one. It’s a family recipe.”

Ramsey can’t help but laugh at the sight of an entire turkey placed in front of him. “At least I can eat this one.” He thinks to himself. He excitedly grabs his knife and fork. Ready to dig in as he has been waiting to eat for hours.

He cuts into the turkey and then suddenly…….

***  
“Oh fuck me.” Ramsay shouts. Slamming his utensils onto the table.

****

Kraft dinner spills all over the plate. Revealing the true form of the tukey.   
Trevor smiles expectantly. 

“What are you smiling about you donkey?!” Ramsey screams. “What is wrong with you people. Kraft dinner, in a turkey.”

Trevor’s smile dropped. “That’s our aesthetic Mr.Ramsey. Kraft dinner is everything my family.”

Ramsey places his head in his hands. “You’re making it sound like it’s a part of the family.”  
“Well,why don’t you meet our three children while you wait for your cake.”  
Ramsey sighs. “Alright. Send back the turkey.”

He watches as Trevor returns to the kitchen. He shakes his head. “At least they can’t incorporate Kraft dinner into a cake.”

“These guys really bring a new brand of crazy...with a K.” Ramsey comments towards the two customers who laugh at his creative pun.  
***  
Back in the kitchen, Collen slaves over the cake. Trevor rushes past her into his office.   
“Is something wrong Honey?” Collen asks.   
“Ramsey wants to see the children.” He shouts from a distance. Colleen tenses on the spot.  
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”   
Trevor exits the office. He looks Colleen straight in the eye. “Colleen. These are our children. Ramsey understands our family values. He has five children for Christ sakes.”

Trevor embraces his wife. “Seeing our children and what we have created for them will open up his eyes.”   
Colleen softly smiles. “I think he will too. Ramsey is a very understanding man.” She returns to her cake batter. “Now leave me to work.”

****

Trevor stalks into the dining area. “Michelle please set out three chairs for our children.”   
Michelle glare her shoulder. “Shall I boil the water while I’m at it?”

Ramsey shoots a questioning glance towards the camera. Not fully understanding what exactly Michelle means. 

Trevor fumes. His face boils in anger. “How dare you!” He shouts. The customers worriedly watch the heated exchange. “These are children you’re talking about.”

Michelle rolls her eyes. “If you could call them that.”   
Trevor clenches his fist and looks Michelle dead in the eye. “Go home.”   
“No! You send me off like that! I’ve worked here from day one. “  
“Out! Before I call the police.” 

With tears in her eyes Michelle storms towards the door. She turns to Ramsey, “Good luck! These people are crazy.” She then exits the restaurant and slams the door behind her. 

Trevor, still fuming places three chairs at Ramsey’s table. “I apologize. The children will be with you shortly.”

Gordon Ramsay could only stare in awe as the man retreated back to the kitchen. Ramsey turns to his camera crew.   
“In all my years in service, I’ve never seen a situation handled so poorly.”

*****

Ramsey couldn’t contain his laughter at the sight of three kraft dinner boxes seated in front of them. Trevor watches him shock. “What’s so funny?” He asks.  
“You can’t be serious.”   
“What do you mean?”  
“So you’re telling me this is your family? All I see is three boxes of kraft dinner.”

“I can’t believe you’d say that in the presence of children. I’ll have you know my kids are very self conscious.”  
“What?!” Ramsey shouts. 

“Everyday my kids are stuck watching the other children attend school, hang out with friends, and experience the world. They can’t even move from my desk.”

Ramsey in surprise. He cannot comprehend what he is hearing.   
“Do you know how upsetting it is for Colleen and I, to see our children lacking a childhood. Do you how hard I’ve tried to get them into the best schools.”

Ramsey turns to the camera. “You’ve got to be kidding me.” He replies.   
Trevor shakes his head. “You don’t know what we’ve been through. The least you could do is act respectfully around our children.”

Ramsey is unable to respond.  
***  
Colleen exits the kitchen with the cake in her hand. She is unable to pick on the tension between Gordon Ramsay and her husband. 

She sets the cake in front of Ramsey. “Ah, I see you’ve met the children.”  
Ramsey rolls his eyes. “Yes but I’m afraid I couldn’t catch their names.”

“Oh, how silly of you Trevor.” She pats her husband on the shoulder.   
“Colleen I think you should…”  
“Oh no, don’t be silly Trev.” She points to the box on the far right. “This is our Oldest Mac. He is such an original boy.” She points at the second box. “This is Shelly, our little girl. Just like other girls she’s a chatterbox and loves the ocean. And finally, this is our youngest Bow. Bow can be very twisted sometimes. But we love him all the same.”

Ramsey is completely floored. He has never been so quiet in his life. Instead he reaches for the cake. 

Slicing into it, he discovers the true horror held within. Before him, lies a cake made completely out of Kraft Dinner. 

With nothing to say and a strong unwillingness to try the cake, he gets out of his chair and leaves Trevor, Colleen and their three kids to stand in utter shock. 

The

End

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading, we worked really hard on this :)


End file.
